Pay for a real wedding, maybe then the divorce rate won't be so high! - Amy Cheong

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Firstly, let's dissect Amy Cheong's Facebook post into parts:

1)  How many fcuking days do malay weddings at void decks go on for???
- They go on for up to three days sometimes. And they don't spend all three days "doing it".

2)  Pay for a real wedding u asshole, maybe then the divorce rate wont be so high!
- Some people spend millions of dollars on "a real wedding". Some of them still get divorced in the end. The amount of money spent on weddings is not co-related to the rate of divorce.

3) How can society allow ppl to get married for 50 bucks?
-  I would be surprised if she really thinks a wedding reception held at the void deck costs $50/- all in. Doesn't make sense.

What can we deduce from this image of her Facebook wall?
- Her cover photo shows her at her own wedding but yet states her relationship as "It's complicated".
- Studied at University of Western Australia.
- Presently works at NTUC (a quick check revealed that she holds an Assistant Director post).

A statement by NTUC Membership on their Facebook:
Dear fans of NTUC Membership, we have been alerted of an inappropriate comment, allegedly made by one of our staff recently. This matter is being investigated and we will have a report in due course. This is a serious concern to all of us and will be addressed shortly. The Labour Movement centers on inclusivity and we will not accept words or action of any of our staff that is insensitive or offending to any community.

Now let's dissect Amy Cheong's apology.

1) Hi All, I sincerely apologize for my silly comment.
- It is not "silly", my dear. It's "offensive". A silly mistake is something which was not done on purpose. Yours is not in this category. You had time to think but you still chose to go there.

2) It is no way a reflection of NTUC and the good works it has done and is doing for its members. It was my own bad judgement of which I truly regret. 
- It sure sounds like her boss made her say this. The only thing you regret Amy, is losing your job and then finding a new one, what with your black record all over the Internet. Oh by the way, "work" in the context of your sentence, cannot be quantified. Therefore there's no singular or plural for it.

3) I sincerely do not mean to distress the Malay community with my comment, I was just upset with the noise. I truly do not mean to be judgmental or critical. I am truly sorry.
-  We live in clusters. Families of every creed and race piled on top of one another and side by side, only separated by walls and ceilings. There is always going to be some kind of pollution, whether they be noise, air, etc. Maybe your time away from Singapore has made you delusional. Time to snap back to reality.

She also has a Twitter account which at the moment is set to "Hi All, It was a silly comment. It was not meant to be 'racist' comment and I do apologize for any distress it has caused" mode.

In addition, let me clarify some things on Malay weddings held at HDB void decks.

It's a tradition based on being all-inclusive.

Not all Malay weddings are held at void decks but for those that are, doing so allows everyone and anyone to be involved in some way or other.

Malay weddings are usually held on weekends. This is when people usually have their own plans. Making it an all-day or all-weekend affair allows people to drop in anytime it's convenient for them, catch up with relations, eat some, congratulate the newlyweds, take some photos and move on to the next item on their itinerary.

It's not like a show that goes on for a few hours which guests have no choice but to sit down to from start to finish. What if there are a few weddings to attend to on any given day? Hence this arrangement also allows guests to hop from wedding to wedding instead of having to choose which one to go to and in the process offend those whose weddings were chosen to be absent from.

Also, the focus on Malay weddings is not about recouping the money spent to hold it. Anyone, even those not on the guest list can drop in and enjoy the festivities. If it was held somewhere closed to the public, how is this possible? Also, a money packet is polite, but not a must. It's not about Return of Investment. It's a wedding. Not a business deal.

Maybe living in clusters are taking a toll on us, like being in a pressure cooker. However looking at Singapore's land-scarce situation, this is not about to change. Let us not adopt a shoot first ask questions later approach. Try to understand the root of the issue first. Then maybe we can get along.